What Is an Identity Crisis? Definition, Examples, and How to Cope

What is an identity crisis?

An identity crisis is a time of internal analysis of who you are and how you present yourself to the world. When your internal sense of identity matches your external presentation, you are balanced. An identity crisis occurs when there is confusion between your societal role and personal identity, either because the role and identity don’t match or you are unsure of your true identity. 

Where does the idea of identity come from?

Developmental psychologist Erik Erikson first studied the idea of an identity crisis in teenagers and young adults. Erikson believed the identity crisis was a crucial phase of development that bridged the divide between childhood and adulthood. 

An identity crisis is, at its core, a conflict between who you perceive yourself as and how you act or behave in society. This conflict comes to a natural head in late adolescence. Teenagers start to branch out from who they were told they are and form their own sense of identity, which is often at odds with the role of child, student, sibling, and other roles they inhabit. 

According to Erikson’s theory, an identity crisis is a time of internal analysis about who you are and how you fit into society. He notes that adolescence is not the only time an identity crisis occurs, and periods of change or stress can also spur an identity crisis.

Is it normal to have an identity crisis as an adult?

Identity crises can be difficult and emotionally and mentally challenging, but are perfectly healthy, according to most developmental theories. What is worse than the pain of an identity crisis is forming no self-identity at all, a stage of identity called Diffusion. 

Diffusion is one of the four identity statuses as explained by James Marcia, who expanded upon Erikson’s theory. Marcia believed that the root of identity lay in commitment. To have a strong identity, you have to commit to just one. From this, he extrapolated four phases of identity:

• Foreclosure: This is a phase where individuals commit to an identity without exploring other options. It can limit personal growth and self-discovery.
• Achievement: In this phase, individuals have explored different options and commitments before settling on a clear identity that aligns with their values and beliefs. It reflects a sense of confidence and self-awareness.
• Diffusion: This phase involves a lack of commitment and exploration, leading to confusion and uncertainty about one's identity. Individuals in this phase may feel lost or unsure about their goals and values.
• Moratorium: During this phase, individuals are actively exploring different identities and possibilities without making a final commitment. It is a period of questioning and experimentation to find one's true self.

Not everyone will go through every phase. It can be helpful to reflect on these phases and ask yourself: Have you explored your sense of identity? Have you committed to an identity? Are you happy with your choice? 

Sometimes, people going through an identity crisis will fall back onto maladaptive coping mechanisms. These are behaviors that relieve distressing emotions but at a cost to your mental, emotional, and physical health. Examples of maladaptive coping mechanisms include substance abuse, self-harm, and reckless behavior. 

What causes an identity crisis?

Erikson believed an identity crisis occurs at the precipice of adulthood, when a child starts to transition into their adult roles. Research backs this idea, but it is not the only place an identity crisis can occur. 

An identity crisis can occur when you are under a lot of stress or during a major life transition. Many people experienced an identity crisis after the 2020 COVID-19 pandemic, because of the overwhelming stress and forced life transition many had to take. 

Other stressful experiences that can trigger an identity crisis include: 

• Moving to a New Place
• Starting College or University
• Career Changes
• Relationship Changes
• Becoming a Parent
• Losing a loved one 
• Trauma

These are just some causes of identity disorder; it is not a complete list. 

Signs you’re having an identity crisis

Erikson believed that identity was formed through experimenting with different behaviors and roles. Therefore, an identity crisis is marked by shifting feelings about yourself, your purpose, your behavior, and how you interact with others. 

Signs you’re having an identity crisis include:

• You question your basic sense of self, values, and beliefs.
• You experience imposter syndrome.
• You feel aimless or disconnected from yourself.
• You feel dissatisfied with life and anxious about the future.
• You change yourself to fit different social situations.
• You find it difficult to answer questions about yourself. 
• You don’t think you can trust yourself to make good decisions.
• You overly seek external validation to make up for your lost sense of identity.
• You struggle with low self-esteem.
• You spend a lot of time self-reflecting and second-guessing yourself. 

 An identity crisis can change major changes in your life, including separating from people, jobs, locations, and things that you once held dear. It can be a confusing time because of this.

Identity Crisis and Personality Disorders

Identity Crises are not a diagnosable mental health condition. Most of the time, they are completely normal and even healthy. Identity is, however, a crucial component in mental illnesses like dissociative disorders and personality disorders. 

Mental health issues that deal strongly with one’s sense of identity include Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID, colloquially known as multiple personality disorders) and personality disorders.

How to cope with an identity crisis

An identity crisis is a time of self-transformation and can set you down a great path. To do so, lean into the identity crisis. Ask yourself the hard questions, try out different identities, and be mindful about what works for you. 

1. Explore different identities: Embrace the identity crisis by trying out different identities. Take note of how you feel and the effects of that identity. Slowly you’ll start piecing together a “you” that feels best. 
2. Live according to your values: Figure out what values are important to you and act according to them. Before you make a decision, ask yourself: What would I do if I acted according to my values, not my emotions?
3. Let yourself self-reflect: Self-reflection when you’re in an identity crisis is a good thing. Now is the time to figure out who you are and what you want to do with it. Consider journaling or mindfulness to help you with your journey. 
4. Set healthy boundaries with others: As you’re figuring out who you are, you might rely on other people’s opinions and affirmations. To prevent external validation from informing your identity, set good boundaries with the people around you. 
5. Practice healthy coping mechanisms: An identity crisis can bring with it uncomfortable emotions like anxiety and depression. Deal with these feelings healthily without overly relying on substances or other unhealthy coping mechanisms.

Questions you can ask yourself to work through the identity crisis include:

• What are my values?
• What am I passionate about?
• What do I believe? 
• What role do I have in society? Do I like having that role? 
• What do I feel like my purpose is? 
• How do I relate to people? Do I like how I act around them?
• Am I fulfilled in my career? 
• Am I fulfilled with the hobbies and how I choose to spend my time outside of work?
• Who do I want to be in 5 years? 10?

All of these can change throughout a lifetime. You are trying to figure out who you are right now, not who you will always be. The goal is to start piecing together an answer for the biggest question of them all: Who am I?

If you are overwhelmed with an identity crisis, therapy can help. Therapy isn’t just for working through mental health challenges, although it can do that too. If you are struggling and just need someone to talk to or want a more structured approach to managing your identity crisis, talk to a therapist. 

Lifebulb has many online therapists to choose from. Browse our therapist directory or talk to our team to be scheduled with a qualified therapist today. 

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