What is an example of avoidance behavior?

An example of avoidance behavior is avoiding social gatherings or interactions to prevent feelings of rejection or criticism. One might also procrastinate on an exam to avoid feelings of inadequacy or avoid a hard conversation to avoid potential conflict.

What are the 7 signs of avoidant personality disorder?

The signs of avoidant personality disorder may include excessive sensitivity to rejection, feelings of inadequacy, reluctance to engage with others, fear of criticism, avoiding new activities or risks, self-isolation, and difficulty trusting others.

What is avoidant personality disorder?

Avoidant personality disorder is a mental health condition characterized by feelings of extreme social inhibition, inadequacy, and sensitivity to negative evaluation, leading individuals to avoid social interactions and intimate relationships.

What is an avoidant attachment style?

Avoidant attachment style refers to a pattern of relating to others characterized by the reluctance to depend on others, maintaining emotional distance, and avoiding close relationships due to fear of rejection or abandonment.

10 Avoidant Behaviors and How to Stop Avoiding Things

When you were a kid and you put your hand on a stove, you quickly learned to avoid the stove when it was hot. This type of fear-based learning results in avoidance behaviors and is a vital part of our survival system. If you were mugged while walking down a street, you’d probably try to avoid that street next time. If you ate something that made you sick, you’d avoid that food in the future.

Not all avoidant behaviors are bad, as in the examples above. However, sometimes we form an aversion and avoidance to things that are good for us or would result in personal growth. For example, have you ever avoided sending a difficult email to your coworker? Avoiding it doesn’t make the problem go away, but avoiding it still feels pretty good in the moment.

When avoidant behaviors start impeding your growth, wellness, and happiness, then they have become more than a survival skill. They’ve become a problem. This article goes over what avoidant behaviors look like and how to overcome them.

What Is Avoidant Behavior?

Avoidant behavior is when you steer clear of a person, situation, place, event, thought, or emotion because you believe encountering one of those things will be distressing or dangerous. Sometimes, avoiding it can be the right option. But many times, it simply delays the inevitable.

We avoid things that we perceive to be dangerous to us, but what is dangerous to us can be subjective. One person may find the ocean dangerous but not a hard conversation with a close friend. Someone else may rather dive with sharks than confront a crossed boundary.

Avoidant behaviors become problematic when they keep us from growing and/or keep us from experiencing good things. A hard conversation about a friend crossing a boundary may not be comfortable, but it will help you grow in your relationship with your friend and yourself.

Examples of Avoidance Behaviors

These are 10 avoidant behaviors that are used when we feel threatened, scared, or uncomfortable. If you find yourself using any of these behaviors, ask yourself why. What are you avoiding?

Withdrawal: Some individuals may withdraw from social interactions, preferring to isolate themselves when feeling overwhelmed or anxious.
Procrastination: Putting off important tasks or decisions can be a way to avoid facing challenges or fears, but it often leads to increased stress and pressure.
Denial: Avoiding difficult truths or uncomfortable emotions by denying their existence or downplaying their impact.
Substance Use: Using alcohol, drugs, or other substances as a means of escaping or numbing emotional pain or distress.
Emotional Distancing: Keeping emotions at a distance, either by avoiding deep conversations or suppressing feelings to appear unaffected.
Overworking: Throwing oneself into work or activities to the point of exhaustion to avoid addressing personal issues or emotional pain.
Escapism: Immersing oneself in excessive TV, gaming, or other distractions to avoid confronting challenging thoughts or emotions.
Minimizing: Downplaying the significance of one's emotions, experiences, or challenges as a way to avoid confronting their true impact, which can hinder addressing underlying concerns.
People-Pleasing: Overextending oneself to meet the perceived expectations of others, often at the expense of one's own needs and emotions, in order to avoid conflict or discomfort.
Fantasy or Daydreaming: Seeking refuge in elaborate fantasies or daydreams as a means of escaping from present difficulties or to avoid facing reality.

Are Avoidant Behaviors Always Bad?

Once you identify your avoidant behavior, you can find out what you are avoiding. From there, ask yourself why you are avoiding it. Is it something threatening to your physical or emotional safety? If so, does avoiding it guarantee your safety, or would facing the problem more directly be beneficial? Is the thing you are avoiding something that would result in a positive thing for you, but is distressing to achieve or face?

Let’s look at some strategies to overcome avoidant behaviors and start facing the areas of growth and challenge in your life.

How to Stop Avoiding Hard Things

Avoidance behavior isn’t always a bad thing. In some situations, it can keep you safe. Ask yourself, does the thing you are avoiding pose a significant risk to your physical or emotional health? If it does, then avoiding it until you can seek escape or a more permanent solution may be the right choice. If you are in a dangerous situation, reach out to a mental health hotline or call 911 for immediate service.

If you are not in immediate danger, then you may want to put a stop to your avoidance behavior. Here are some steps to do so:

Identify what you are avoiding. For example: A hard conversation with your partner about how you divide up the chores in your household.
Understand why you are avoiding it. For example: You don’t want to cause tension and conflict. You’re worried about how they can react.
Make a list of ways you can address it. For example: Ask them to have a conversation about it. Have a family meeting. Talk to a therapist about it.
Make a plan. For example: Prep them beforehand with a simple text saying what you’d like to talk about. Come prepared with solutions.
Reward yourself. You did something really hard, and you should avoid yourself for addressing one of your fears.
Find new ways to cope with distress. In the future, how can you cope with stress in a healthy way? For example, going for a run or walk, talking to a friend, or journaling about your thoughts.
Practice emotional regulation skills. Avoidant behaviors often arise because we don’t know how to deal with the emotions of fear, anxiety, and overwhelm associated with the task, event, or person we are avoiding. To help prevent avoidance behavior in the future, practice good emotional regulation skills.
Talk to a therapist: If you consistently struggle with avoidance behaviors, talking to a therapist can help. A licensed therapist can help you address the root of your avoidance behaviors and build healthier coping skills.

If you are constantly avoiding problems in your life, you limit your ability to grow and thrive. Talk to a Lifebulb therapist today about avoidance behaviors. We accept most major insurance plans and have little to no wait list.