For many people today, it’s relatively easy to get what they want when they want it. You want a new pair of shoes? Three clicks and it’s in your online shopping cart. Want that new video game that just released? You don’t even have to go to the store; you can download it from your couch. Why wait for a full meal that will take an hour to cook when you can just grab a bag of chips?
Instant gratification asks us, “Why wait, when you could have what you want right now?”
Turns out, there are many reasons why you should wait. As good as instant gratification feels in the moment, it can have negative long-term consequences on our physical, mental, relational, and financial health.
Learn how to ignore the pull of instant gratification in this article.
What Is Instant Gratification?
Instant gratification is the urge to have a good thing now instead of waiting for something potentially better. It likely comes from a survival instinct to not let an opportunity for food, water, or safety pass us by.
In today’s world, those survival instincts are not always needed. What happens in its place is a tendency to choose smaller, immediate rewards over larger, delayed rewards. This phenomenon is called Instant Gratification.
Examples of Instant Gratification
You might be giving into instant gratification without even knowing it. Instant gratification has become commonplace and even something to be proud about. Some examples of instant gratification include:
- Eating junk food instead of cooking a healthy meal
- Scrolling social media for hours instead of working or studying
- Binge-watching TV shows instead of going to bed on time
- Online shopping for things you don’t need
- Playing video games instead of completing responsibilities
- Checking your phone during a conversation or meeting
- Spending money on luxuries instead of saving or investing
- Texting or calling someone for quick emotional validation
- Smoking, drinking, or using substances to relieve stress instantly
- Skipping workouts for comfort or laziness
- Choosing gossip or drama for entertainment
- Reacting impulsively in arguments rather than thinking things through
- Procrastinating important tasks for short-term comfort
- Using credit cards for immediate purchases you can’t afford
- Eating dessert first or indulging while ignoring portion control
The goal of instant gratification is to get to where you’re going as fast as you can, but this isn’t always the best idea. For something to last and sustain us, it takes time.
What Are the Problems with Instant Gratification?
The classic Stanford Marshmallow Study placed a marshmallow in front of young children. The children were told that if they waited 15 minutes, they would get 2 marshmallows. The study found that those who waited grew up to be more successful: higher SAT scores, better social skills, and better health. It was a landmark study in instant gratification.
In the decades since, this study has been partially debunked. The results weren’t controlled for things like socioeconomic status, which can have a big impact on how kids feel about food and how successful they’ll be in school and other metrics later on in life.
But the overall message remains the same: good things come to those who wait.
There are many drawbacks to instant gratification. For example:
- Not being able to keep off the weight you loss with a diet pill
- Mounting credit card debt
- Missing out on long-term goals and successes
- Unable to keep a long-term relationship
- Feeling addicted to your instant gratification vices
Anxiety, depression, sleep issues, and addiction are also potential problems with chronic instant gratification.
What Is the Root Cause of Instant Gratification?
If you find yourself constantly reaching for the phone, a sugary snack, a new quick relationship fling, or an online shopping spree, you might start to feel really guilty about it.
Instant gratification doesn’t make us feel good long-term. Over time, you’ll start to question, “Why can’t I just stop? Am I weak? Am I not good enough?”
No. There is a biological reason behind your addiction to instant gratification.
Your brain wants to survive. It hasn’t caught up to the fact yet that it is not running from predators and foraging for its food. Sometimes, this means that it does something that it thinks is good for you but is actually harmful. Instant gratification is one of those reasons.
The root cause behind instant gratification is the need to attain good things quickly in order to survive. Your brain is hard-wired for this connection, so it takes conscious energy and effort to stop and choose the delayed reward. Let’s look at how to do this below.
5 Steps to Overcome Instant Gratification
Here are some tips to overcome instant gratification. Remember to start small and escalate the difficulty slowly. It’s hard to quit something cold turkey. Taking things one step at a time can yield a more sustainable result.
- Start with a 10-minute delayed gratification: Let’s say you have the urge to reach for your phone. Instead of giving in right away, wait for 10 minutes. Once that becomes easy, wait for 20 minutes. Slowly up the time you are making yourself wait. You might notice that you stop wanting that addictive thing.
- Limit the highly addictive activities: Most people will struggle with things that are highly addictive, like sugar, sex, shopping, or scrolling. Start limiting how often you allow yourself to engage in these things. A replacement behavior can help. A replacement behavior is something you can do instead of the addictive behavior, like going for a walk, listening to your favorite song, or talking to a friend.
- Use an accountability partner: Don’t fight instant gratification alone. Get a trusted friend to come along with you. Hold each other accountable and lean on each other for support.
- Understand your why: Why do you want to shop? Why are you reaching for the dating apps again? Are you running from an emotion like boredom, sadness, or fear? Do you want something, like company, distraction, or fun? Knowing why you are doing what you are doing will help you implement the steps to stop.
- Talk to a therapist: If instant gratification has become a big issue for you, a therapist can help. Some mental health disorders make instant gratification harder to resist, and over time, bad habits that are hard to break can begin to form. A good therapist will help you identify the root cause behind your instant gratification and work with you to break free from it.
To talk to a therapist about instant gratification, reach out to Lifebulb Therapy. We have therapists with no wait list and who accept most insurances. The next time you’re reaching for your phone to scroll, try calling a therapist instead.
