Therapy can be a big commitment. Most people will meet with their therapist 12-20 times. Carving out an hour every week, plus travel time, and budgeting for that cost can add up.
Research shows that therapy is effective at reducing mental illness symptoms and improving overall life satisfaction. Still, it’s understandable to get frustrated with the process. Why is it taking so long? Why can’t you just be fixed already?
How Long Does Therapy Take
How long therapy takes will depend entirely on you and your needs. Someone with multiple, complex conditions will need to be in therapy for longer than someone who is just looking for a little extra support through a difficult life transition.
In general, most short-term types of problems can be resolved within 12-20 sessions. If you’re going once a week, that’s 4-6 months.
Some conditions require long-term care, called maintenance therapy. For example, conditions like Schizophrenia or Bipolar Disorder often require long-term therapy, even if the client is doing much better. The goal is to prevent a relapse of symptoms.
Does Therapy Work?
Yes! Therapy has been proven very effective at treating a wide array of issues.
How effective therapy is will depend on a number of factors, including:
- A good client-therapist relationship: A good therapist is one whom you can trust and feel comfortable around. If you don’t feel comfortable being vulnerable around your therapist, the therapy process will be greatly impeded.
Read this article on Therapist Red Flags to get an idea of what makes a good (and bad) therapist.
- Open to Change: Sometimes therapy will challenge you. You might learn of things that need to change in yourself or in your life. Being open to this change is key in effective therapy.
- Putting in the Effort: You won’t get better just by showing up. Therapy is an active process, and you get in what you put in. Putting in the effort to be vulnerable and honest is important.
Eventually, you might get to a place where you feel like you’re getting better. How do you know if therapy worked, and you can be done? Let’s take a look at some signs.
How Do I Know if Therapy Is Working
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These are signs that therapy is working and you’re on the right path. It doesn’t mean the work is done yet; it just means that you’re with the right therapist and putting in the work. Take these signs as encouragement that things are going to get better.
“It’ll get worse before it gets better,” is a common saying in therapy. How come? Many people hide the worst of their symptoms behind maladaptive coping mechanisms like dissociation and distraction. As you work towards the heart of the issue, those maladaptive coping mechanisms will fall away, leaving the core issue raw and open. This can cause a short-term spike in symptoms. It doesn’t mean that therapy isn’t working. In fact, having a brief influx of symptoms can mean that you’re getting close to the heart of the issue.
You’re able to handle your triggers more easily.
Therapy doesn’t make the bad times go away. They provide you with the skills you need to survive the bad times. You might still be triggered by the same things you did before therapy. Through therapy, you will be able to manage those triggers better.
For example, let’s say you have a really hard time in grocery stores because of the fluorescent lights, crowds, and big stores. Before therapy, even stepping into a store could trigger a panic attack. After therapy, you still hate stores. You get your groceries delivered whenever you can. But when you have to be inside a store, you’re able to do so with accommodations like noise-cancelling headphones, going in with a friend, and having a plan.
Your relationships are improving.
Mental health issues strain relationships. One sign that therapy is working is if your relationships improve. Ways they might improve include:
- You’re able to be yourself around them.
- You’re able to pour into them without burning yourself out.
- You want to hang out with them more.
- You’re able to be vulnerable.
- Your communication skills improve, and you have less conflict.
These are just some of the ways your relationships can improve with therapy.
Taking care of yourself is a little easier.
You sleep better, eat healthier, and exercise regularly. You take care of your personal hygiene by showering regularly and brushing your teeth every morning and night. These seemingly small things might have been difficult for you before therapy. Now, they happen without having to expend a huge amount of energy.
You bounce back from setbacks.
Bad things will still happen. You’ll have a panic attack or get triggered by what someone said. You might fight with your partner or have a hard meeting with your boss. These things are inevitable, but with therapy, you can bounce back quicker.
You don’t internalize the negative things that happen. You understand that bad things happening don’t make you a bad person. You’re able to look at the situation neutrally and seek ways to improve.
You feel more like yourself.
Mental illness can steal your sense of self. Maybe it’s been a long time since you’ve felt like yourself. Slowly, through therapy, you come back to yourself. People describe it as waking up after a long, long time asleep.
Slowly, the things you used to love start to spark joy again. You dance to music and look forward to a good meal. You have goals and dreams for your future. You know yourself just a little bit better.
You’re excited for the future.
What once felt like a long slog through survival is starting to have a glimmer of hope. It might start with something small, like going home to watch your favourite TV show. Then it grows; you’re excited for the change of the seasons, or a friend coming to visit. You’re excited about going back to school or learning a new skill. Eventually, you’ll get excited about those big life things again and start building a life you’re happy to be in.
Your mind is a happier place.
Cognitive distortions are rampant in mental health issues. It can feel like your brain is working against you or even like it hates you.
After therapy, you’ll be able to separate yourself from these thoughts. Eventually, you can replace them with neutral thoughts, and then positive thoughts.
Over time, your brain will slowly become a happier place to exist.
You’re going after what you want.
Your self-esteem will improve through therapy, and with it, your confidence. The goals that once felt impossible start looking a lot more doable. Plans start to get laid out, and you take the first few steps towards those big goals you had.
You don’t crave bad habits.
The maladaptive behaviors that used to hold you back no longer intrigue you. In fact, you start to want to do the hard, healthy stuff. Your body starts to crave runs and healthy foods. Your brain craves stimulation and invigorating social connections.
It won’t happen all at once, but slowly, therapy will help realign your mind and body to crave the things that are good for it.
You have more fun!
Too many of us have forgotten: Life should be fun! When in therapy, you should start to notice that your joy for living is returning little by little. It might start by laughing at a joke or savoring your morning cup of coffee.
Therapy should reignite that light for life. Slowly, you’ll start having fun again.
What If Therapy Isn’t Working?
Therapy takes time. Give it a few weeks. If things still aren’t improving, talk to your therapist about it. They can adjust your treatment plan. If it still doesn’t work, consider if your therapist is truly a good fit.
Switching therapists is perfectly okay, and even encouraged! Not every therapist will be the perfect fit for every client, and a good therapist will understand that. You can ask your current therapist for referrals to therapists who might be a better fit.
Recommended Article: How to “Break Up” With Your Therapist
If you’re struggling with your current therapist or are looking to start therapy, Lifebulb can help. We have therapists who are available this week and accept most major insurances.
